Monday, April 22, 2013

soooo...

so... i don't even know what to say about life lately. i'd be lying if i wrote that i don't try to keep things mostly rainbows and sunshine on the blog. not because i'm trying to act like my life is so much better than yours [come see me, any illusion of that will be gone in 0.002 seconds], but because i figure no one wants to read the crap of everyday life. my friend, suz, did some really great posts last week about being authentic last week, and i figured what the heck.

i've been in a weird place since the marathon. at times i wonder if i made a mistake in running it. i sacrificed weight training to train for this marathon and i also let my eating get a little out of control. so while i can all myself a marathoner, i'm up 10 pounds on the scale, i've been dead tired, and i've done something to mess up my back. not great.

i don't like to complain. i know there are so many people dealing with things that are so much worse than anything i'm dealing with. i also know that i serve an amazing God who has a unique plan for me, so i try not to worry. but sometimes i just fail miserably. right now i'm feeling a little overwhelmed and hopefully i'll get to a better place soon.

brad and i spent the weekend in gatlinburg with my best friend and her husband. it was such a great time. i've been looking forward to it ever since we planned it. yet, on friday as we were packing to go, i was having a borderline panic attack because our house is a wreck. crazy.

what do you do when you feel overwhelmed?

have you ever regretted doing something that most people consider a huge accomplishment?


12 comments:

  1. Dang I'm so sorry you are feeling like this. I think you should be so proud of yourself. But as someone who really does have generalized anxiety disorder, I understand that panicked feeling all too well. This too shall pass, my friend.

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  2. So sorry you are overwhelmed right now..all you can do is take one day at a time. I don't think you should regret your marathon it is an amazing accomplishment and does make it hard to control eating since it makes you hungry all the time. Just concentrate on where you are now and what you can do to move forward. Writing it down always helps me.

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  3. I loved Suzanne's post on authenticity too:) It's okay to be real, everyone has bad times and I think it's a way we can relate to and support each other. The marathon is a great accomplishment! Feeling the way you do is normal but you will get through this. I agree with Christy, one day at a time:) The extra weight will come off and things will calm down. You are right that God has a plan for us and we just have to go with the flow. Hard to do I know;)

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  4. I wonder if you have a case of the post marathon blues?? I guess no one really talks about it much on their blog but it happens to lots of people. There is so much build up of happiness and anticipation, that after the race is over, it's kinda like, what now? All of that EVERYTHING feeling is gone. Maybe I'm crazy but it happened to me after my first marathon.

    I'm the same as you when it comes to a clean house. I want my house to look like a Pottery Barn catalogue. It's tough with three kids but I can't stand a mess or a dirty sink, etc. It just drives me to be moody.

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  5. I love Suz's post about being real!!!
    I felt the same way after my first half marathon!! Just in a funk!!!
    Make a plan, stick to it, and do even when you dont feel like it!

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  6. I agree with Coy. I definitely think that's what you have. Focus on what's ahead of you. But you are allowed to feel out of sorts. Just take one day at a time :)

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  7. When I trained for my half last Spring I gained a few pounds too and was so discouraged by that after it was all over with... post race let down? Maybe.

    I know you will find something new to focus on and that will perk you up for sure!

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  8. I'm so sorry you are feeling overwhelmed and off Courtney. Sometimes that happens to us. I will pray for you and you are definitely in the right mindset. Just stay positive and pray!

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  9. Hey you! I'm so glad you wrote this post -- not because you're feeling down, but because you're sharing it with others and recognizing that we all experience these overwhelming moments and can connect with each other even more, on various levels:) Sometimes one of the most difficult things to do is to "let go and let God" but I promise you -- a simple prayer asking for comfort, peace, strength, security etc. in tough times works miracles. When I finally admit to being overwhelmed I'm usually a breath or two away from a panic attack, so I mentally (sometimes physically!) fall to my knees.

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  11. As always we are on the same page on so many different levels. After my next marathon I think I'm scheduling a vacation and lots of fun activities to keep me busy.

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